Book with text round 2

I re-read the text for the book last night and straight away noticed a number of things i didn't like. I have spent today rewriting and also reordering the pages. These are the issues I have aimed to fix:

- There was too much repetition of certain terms within the book, specifically the dogs name, polar bears and the word thought. This was made worse by the repetitive text on each page. Each page was constructed in a very similar way making the narrative feel broken up. I think this is because I have a good idea of the narrative and tried to write the text with each individual page in mind. The text would not work if taken off the pages and made into a continuous piece of writing.
- I have spent time today making connections between pages, the transitions between them seemed clunky if the first draft, especially as they often started with the dogs name. It was almost like a reset at the beginning of each page making it difficult to create any feeling of a flow to the story. I tried to work out some ways to connect the pages then went back through again to make sure they weren't obviously added on to the original text, I have reshaped each page to suite to pacing of the narrative.
- As I went back through the story it occurred to me that some of the pages could be reordered. There were some unnecessary changes of location within the book where the characters went back and forth between locations. I was having trouble with one of the pages and realised that switching the order not only made the story easy to follow it allowed me to make the point of the story clearer.
- The end of the book seemed to lack any impact in the first draft, the beginning of the book builds up to the dog characters going on his adventure to discover who he is but then the ending didn't really say anything. it was not particularly happy or sad and didn't really address the main character questioning his identity or what has changed.
- I am going to get more feedback on this draft and see if I need another round of changes.